Intro and Explanation: May Meditation
May Meditation Be Sweet to Yourself
It can be a small sentence like, “ugh, that was stupid, why did I do that?” or it can be going down the rabbit hole of beating yourself up, either way let’s break that habit!!! The meditation for this month is for self-love, to replace the negative self-talk with love.
You know when you are in love you have boundless energy, everything is “amazing”, you have patience, and you radiate light and joy. There is a flow. Well wouldn’t that be amazing to create just by loving yourself? After all it all starts with you and from there everything else occurs.
So self-love and kindness is a must if we are to be in relationship with others. Sometimes it is challenging if you are already going down the rabbit hole but this is where you are being given the opportunity to observe and shift your focus to what is more interesting to you. Would you rather focus on berating yourself OR taking an action that moves you toward a goal? For me, it is the physical act, the action itself that can shift my mental state.
Look, sometimes we just aren’t happy, peppy, smilely, or energized but if we can just keep moving, even ever so slightly, we will begin to build the muscle of shifting our focus. I am not advocating busy work or rushing around avoiding our feelings. In fact, just the opposite. I want you to be conscious of where we are and to still play for the game that means so much to us.
For example; I have been doing a lot lately with kid stuff, work stuff etc. ... and have been poooooped, not at all wanting to post little coaching videos or live FB and insta but I promised my communications director (Hi Julie- love ya ) that I would do it! So, I decided to do it in the morning after I meditated and before I was fried and EVEN if I didn’t feel like it. And you know what? It has been ok! I am sharing to help people,I am not thinking about myself at all and that is a good thing. The result is that you always feel better when you actually do something toward your dreams. So women and moms who are here: I am not talking about doing that extra load of laundry or cleaning the bathroom! I am talking about taking that extra yoga class, getting that massage, working on your book for a ½ hour, making the jewelry, writing the speech, sending the email -- any action that moves you forward.
Start with this meditation (click here to see the video), I kept it short at 3 ½ minutes total I think. Do it. Do it everyday!!! Build your self-love muscle and let’s join together and STOP beating ourselves up. Period. For any reason. We are fantastic, we are human, we make mistakes, and we are loveable!!!
Let’s do this together!
Happy Tuesday. love you all!!
You might not even realize it but your mind does not like change! Taking action -- and the shifts that come with it -- can trigger worry, doubt, and fear. And they (aka the Monkey Mind) will try to convince you not to do it! Learn to recognize this when it happens and how to move through it to take that leap! Here's a few tips to get started.
We'd be happy to send our weekly newsletter and monthly meditation right to your inbox! Make sure to sign up today so you can get next week's new video. Click here to join!
What is a sit spot? I can remember when my kids were on nature walks in school and they would say, “time for everyone to find a sit spot”. A place away from each other where they could sit and appreciate nature and themselves. I use this a lot.
I like to find a little gorgeous spot and just sit, even if for a minute. It makes a difference in your day and in your overall vibe. But sometimes, let’s face it, we aren’t in a nature place to “sit”. I have even just done it in my car. Creating a space to breath and connect to the sounds I hear. This slows things down and relaxation just happens without force. It is a game changer for moving on to the next thing.
For me it is especially powerful when I am stressed or have been affected by someone else and I need to “shake it off.” Even, as a mom, it is like a ‘time out” for us to re-set, re-charge and then make dinner hahahaha. Whatever it takes. Most importantly it is allowing ourselves to step out and take a minute.
Isn’t it so true that with all the information coming at us and to us, it has created a poverty of attention? It is a bit mind-numbing as things are so distracting. You start one thing, then another pops up, then someone asks you to do something, then your phone rings, then you have to get to an app. And by now you totally forgot about the first thing you were doing that you didn’t even finish. Turning off the distractions, doing one thing at a time until complete (not multitasking), then doing the next best thing and so on is how I have gained focus. AND, the sit spot :)
Try it. When you aren’t focused, or are overwhelmed, stressed, scared you “can’t” do something, procrastinating, etc. . . . just sit, take a minute. Breathe. Consciously inhale, hold the breath, exhale, continue that and hear: the garbage truck drive by, the bird, a dog barking, a child crying, someone laughing, cars in the distance. When you open your eyes you will feel clearer, calmer, less rattled, and whew ready to carry on.
Sit, stay calm. and prosper.
Love you guys.
Perspective! Wow, that is a game changer. When things are challenging; looking for the message, the meaning, the lesson. Not easy but it is a muscle that builds as we use it. The pain of the challenge is nothing compared to the pain of, what I like to call, the Groundhog Day syndrome. That’s when you don’t learn the lesson the first time and need to “learn it” over and over. Each time the lesson gets stronger and more fierce.
Do you know what I am talking about? It feels like a hammering. In coaching it is the “seeing” and then the telling the truth about it so that by exposing it you then release it and can move on. When you do that, and it repeats, it is less charged and has less and less impact and eventually that layer of the onion is peeled. This feels a little out there. Hope you all know what I am talking about.
For me personally, the perspective that I am seeing the situation from makes all the difference. If I can’t see it because I am too emotional then I will take a walk. Looking at things in the world, being present to them, even naming them (car, bird, flower, cloud), is a walking meditation and can put you in the present immediately. It is the past and future thinking that causes us so much stress. When you are up against it, some issue, the present is the most important place to be and sometimes the hardest to attain.
Try to connect to the present by walking or meditating. Disrupt your thought patterns. If you ever need guidance let me know. That is an excellent reason to have a coach – build the muscle of perspective and shift your attention to doing something in a new and different way to get different results!
Happy, happy Tuesday. Get outside and “see” what is around you!
Recently I was invited to be an alumni panelist at an upcoming USC event on May 29, 2019. It's going to be a great event and the topic is: Journey Towards Wellness: Integrating Joy in Health. As I prepare, it's got me thinking: what does wellness really mean?
To me it means that you are actively making choices toward a healthy and fulfilling life. Living a life with fulfillment comes from developing your full potential, your inner dreams. I so often talk about putting myself on the “back burner” which is the opposite of fulfillment. My life just took over and was “living me” instead of me living it.
Does this sound familiar? It can happen in a lot of different ways. For some it can be a great, but highly demanding job that just takes over your life and you don’t even realize it until maybe your health starts suffering. For me it was taking care of those I love. But let’s just say my oxygen mask was nowhere to be seen (remember on the airplane they say put your mask on first then put the mask on others who need your help). Health isn’t just living free from dis-ease (disease). It is living in a complete state of physical, mental, and social well-being.
That is where being conscious comes in. Making the choice to put yourself on the front burner. And still taking care of those you love, working your dream job, etc. . . . living from purpose. Hard at first but it is a muscle and it gets stronger and stronger the more you use it.
So often when we are younger, we have our goals that are driven by passion, excitement, and energy. It is unlimited potential, coming from vision and the “I can do anything” belief. As we get older, some things we have accomplished, some things we put down, some things we fell short, and some things got buried under doing for others (spouses, kids, family, friends) and OUR dreams and development were put aside. To see this truthfully is exciting because then we can redirect our energy and intentions to include, bring back, dig up what is important to us. It is like a GPS – if you don’t know where you are, you can’t set the destination. You have to enter your position and then you can put in where you want to go. That trip there, it is the joy!!!
So the journey to wellness is living your purpose, consciously, choosing to live from your most present, intuitive self in the trek to your full potential.
I’d love to help you in your journey! Drop me an email (here) and we can have a free chat to see if coaching could be right for you. I’m also working on my next course which will be open in a few weeks (click here for a preview). And if you’re in the Los Angeles area and would like to attend the USC event on May 29, click here for more info.
I have always been very grateful that I have good parking karma. Hahahaha but true!! Going back to when my kids were very little whether we were going to Disneyland, the grocery, the mall or even school and I was going to need a space, I would say: “Okay guys, get your parking karma on. Think about my spot. Bring it in so when we get there it is ready for us”.
It worked every time. I just always knew I am going to get a spot on the crowded street or in the packed lot. Sometimes we would drive in and literally the person in front of us was pulling out. Sometimes I would have to circle and watch people walking to get it. But either way, it was the knowing that it would happen without a doubt that is the power.
This is an important question: what would you be doing if you knew you couldn’t fail? The how and when are in faith and trust but the knowing it is going to happen puts you in such a state of calm with relaxed, focused energy. In coaching we also call it clarity, focus, ease, and grace. When I am doubting or things aren’t happening NOW (my inner toddler being impatient) I think about my parking karma. I picture the thing I am doubting and I focus on it working. I create the KNOWING it is going to happen and then I take an action toward it.
Action is also a key ingredient. It is not a passive wanting but an active knowing. I know it can be a challenge when you are in a full-blown doubting fit. I have been there!!! When it is a fit, I do my meditation (even if I have already done it that day, I do it again!!!) then, when I am nice and clear, I focus on the knowing.
Meditation, breath, taking authentic action (not just being busy), coming from our life’s intentions (the things that have deep meaning for us), our standards of integrity, vision, etc. are tools I use in my life and when I coach.
If you need help finding your “parking spot”, please reach out to me. I would love to help you and I’m here for you!
Start with the above video for instructions, practice daily with the meditation video below.
The sublime you. What a word. How different would your day be if you came from the place of:
The meditation this month, The Creative Meditation of the Sublime Self, is tapping into that. Your “you-ness” so that you can take advantage of opportunities that present themselves, know what to do, use your intuition! Getting into the flow of your potential.
Have you ever had that feeling? Losing track of time, being so engrossed in something that it feels timeless and effortless? As a tennis player I can remember being in the zone, where I felt unstoppable, like I could do no wrong and as an actress too. Coming onto the stage and wham, just being so in that world, that afterward you don’t even really know what happened. You weren’t on the outside checking in with yourself, how’s it going? You were just totally in it.
We want the ability to put ourselves in the zone, to have more of these moments of creating, being fully present and in it, experiencing the flow.
So why do we come out of the zone or flow? Well, for me it is the monkey mind. The worry that starts to question instead of trust and doubt instead of have faith. That is the muscle we have to build and strengthen. Then we can redirect that worry and doubt to faith and trust with action. This meditation will help build that muscle.
It is a two-part meditation.
First tune in with Ong Namo Guru Dev Namo,
sitting with a tall straight spine.
Then move the hands, alternating hands, from the heart center to 45 degrees toward the floor. Move your hands alternating, as fast as you can without touching your chest or hitting your hands. You should break a sweat here, go fast!!
Then bring your hands together with pinkies touching.
Then place this open flower-like position, in front of your heart center with your eyes gazing at where your pinkies are touching.
Inhale through the nose and, as we exhale, we will repeat HARIANG eight times. You can follow along with me. Inhale through the nose and exhale saying HARIANG 8 times. If you can try to roll the r so that it is touching the pressure point behind your front teeth. Do your best with this.
Enjoy and keep it up for at least 40 days and 90 for this one if you can! Let me know how it goes!!!
Yogi Bhajan said:
You know when they say that “when you are ready, a teacher will appear”? Well, for me that was Yogi Bhajan and Kundalini Yoga and meditation.
When I was 8 or 9 years old, my mom was into Transcendental Meditation (or TM) and she had me meet with the master. I was given a word and I was to practice this meditation twice a day for 20 minutes. Every time I did it, I fell asleep! Which probably was what I needed and also probably what my mom needed (Hahahaha. Love you Mom!)
I had then and still have now a lot of energy! So then flash to many, many years later when a friend asked me to go along to a Kundalini Yoga class. When the meditation involved a Mudra (hand position) that was moving and a Mantra to chant out loud . . . Wowowowow . . . I was just blown away. I didn’t have to sit still or be quiet.
Now in Kundalini, not all of the meditations are moving or out loud but a good number of them are and I tended to gravitate to those. For me that was the gateway to stillness! As the years have gone by, my body now just relaxes when I sit cross-legged on the floor. It’s ready, willing, and wanting that mental break, the calm, the stillness, and clarity that comes from doing the meditations.
This a worthy thing to do for yourself. That is why I am giving you guys a Kundalini Meditation every month. I want you to do them; to see, experience, observe, and quiet the loud chatter that goes on between our ears and distracts you from your path, purpose, the present, and all the goodies that are ready for you to step into. Is it the only way to quiet that mental chatter? No, but for me it has been the most powerful and life changing way.
So this is funny. My morning practice area has been everywhere from sitting next to the washing machine, to my bedroom, the living room, the kitchen and even in the bathroom (when I am on a surf trip with my son and have to be quiet because he is sleeping) hahahaha. Wherever I can sit with a cushion and a mat (even folded up in half). You don’t need that much room.
The most important thing is to have a little pillow or something to sit on so that your spine is straight. This is important because if you are tight in the hamstrings etc., you will hunch or curve your lower back and hips. When you sit on a cushion it straightens your spine.
When I first started I was very curved. This will get better as you relax those tight muscles in your hamstrings and hips. The space should have enough room to straighten your legs and to be able to stand up and move a bit.
Remember as you begin this no matter what your level is or what your body’s limitations are, this is a practice for everyone. It is not a “perfect” science. It is about progress and doing what you can and feeling fantastic about that. That was a big mind shift for me. Not beating myself up for being tight and antsy but doing what I could and every day getting a little more flexible, a little calmer, and a little quieter in the mind. That is the big payoff that keeps me coming back day after day. It is worth it.